Nick Of Time

When we're in a hurry to grow up... we'll never grow... we'll just get old.

Time is a process...

It makes us who we wanna be, and who we should be, and who we could be...

Let time do the hurry.

That Sweet Butterfly On A Wheel Is Tougher Than You

This is a story of a guy who didn’t cry a river but drowned all the girls and why he looks so happy in photographs I’ll absolutely tell you he’s not.


So this is the story of a guy, quite well known for being the heartthrob and asshole at the same time.


The guy every girl will swear she’ll never fall in love with but could never resist it in the end.


And I’m one of those girls who crossed their hearts and hoped to die… but in the end surrendered her heart… but I was the only one who figured out his story… history he kept deep inside.


Was it her fault that he became that man?

Was her decision in life affected him so much that he swore to revenge on every woman?

I don’t know her reasons why she did that but what hurts him most is, was, maybe the lack of explanation.

Maybe she thought it is for the best…

The financial cost worth the heartbreak… look at them now… both of them had realized their dreams because of your decision back years ago… but what you didn’t realize back then was the trauma that you brought to him..

You were the epitome of a perfect woman… the basis… the Mc Farland… the standard… that when he finally found a woman so much like you then it would be the woman of his dreams… the woman he’ll marry. But you ruined that image the moment he saw you chose the wrong decision and made the rest of his life different… your decision changed him… it even changed his name.


All you wanted was a bright future for them… all he wanted was a good example to help him carry on in this life.

You succeeded giving him that future and his living it now… but you failed in becoming the good example for him.

And he thinks every girl deserves to be treated as touch and go because you did it first.

And I feel like I’m obligated to change his views but I’m scared too…

He is scared that he might one day meet a woman like you and treat him the way you treated your men before.

He is scared to get hurt so he’s doing the hurting.

I’m scared, he’s scared… we’re both scared… and I blame it on the weather man.


And if only I’m not that scared rat I would hold you so tight even though that means you will hurt me.

That was her fault… It wasn’t every girls fault…


So I wait… waiting until you realize that I’m not her…

And if you could open up your mind a little wider… maybe you’ll understand why she did that… it’s all because she loves you… love is still the reason… love for you… more than herself… sacrificing her man for you… her image for you… and what else…

You just consider the outcome and not the intention.

If she can’t explain herself… I’m explaining her for you.

Stop hurting yourself…

Your prison is walking thru in this world all along… you better let somebody loves you… before it’s too late…

It’s a sad story… but it doesn’t mean you can never be happy.

When time comes… when you’re not scared anymore and and I’m brave enough to take chances again and accept your love… will you have the courage to admit that you love me too?

I pray for our hearts to be brave enough… to get intertwined…

So here I go again… writing your story… hoping that soon, your story will be mine too… two people with one story… our own happy shared story.



(The CIA who knows that I will dry soil finally greeted me a happy birthday a couple of days ago… thanks… this is dedicated to you)

CIA Knows I'll Dry Soil

I don't know why suddenly I just got interested about your past.

Thanks to the internet.
Now I've known that 2009 was a great year for you.

Because in that year... you met me. hahaha!!!

Isn't that great!!!

anyway, 2009 was a great year for you because a dream came true back then... because you finally got it... and so you met me...
So.. am I just the bonus?
Or was it really your destiny to have it so we'll meet each other?

Think about it.

But the question is... how are we now?

Did we grow?

All I know is that God's masterplan is beautiful.
So I'll just wait for tomorrow to unfold for who knows.

You're my Landon Carter in real world.
My Dawson Leery in my mind.
My Pacey Witter in real life.
And my Peter Pan in my heart.


Godbless us always. Amen.

Paralleled Rounds

Parallelism...
while you're in rounds...

And for your final question...
Do you believe that every Dawson has his Joey and every Joey has her Dawson?

My answer: then that would be a perfect world.


Dawson and Joey could be the perfect epitome of parallelism.
They stand side by side for eternity and always.
But that's it.
The sad thing about perfect parallel is that even eternity could not twist those lines to form a circle so they could connect and be together.
Saddest part... they stay that way.

Are we Dawson and Joey?
Are we the next set of parallel?

Could God lift a finger to twist our lines and finally form a circle? Because no matter how painful it is to get twisted by the hands of God... I think I could bear it... Just thinking about what could happen "if ever" makes the twisting bearable.

Destiny gave up once... I don't want it to give up again.

And just thinking about the twisting makes me realize that God started it already.

And it made me realize more further that you're more of my Pacey than Dawson.
Are you actually Pacey?
Because right now I'm confused.
Nope, actually I'm not.

Teddy is my Dawson and you are my Pacey.
But how long could you play the part of being Dawson before you could finally be Pacey?

I've been praying for you...
just like Jamie did to Landon... but these are movies and TV series... and we are the reality.

We don't hold the script.

Could you help me pray to our God to make a good twist in our script?
I really like you to be a part of it.
And it would be a blessed miracle if God will choose you to have the lead role.

Until then, you do your rounds and I'll be just right here in the parallel.


God bless us.

My Dawson.(My Pacey in disguise of Dawson)

My own personal kryptonite.

CIA Knows I'll Dry Oil

take a peep inside my head...
this is what i do...
i do puzzles and riddles...
only those who could see beyond could decipher these enigmas...

(blues clues: it is now perfect seven... inc. the original)

look crawl ly i nid is
silly crawl no kido o
i do kill son i cry law
i cry law! i do kill son
*Son! I kill law... i do cry
y do i kill crawl son
cars lown
^^do i kill in scary owl
*i kill doin' scary owl
i kill lion scary dow
do wi kill scary lion
wod i kill scary lion
will i scar i do ylon
cars will do only kii
i know ill cry sad oil

*i know i'll cry sad oil
Cia know I'll dry soil

CIA knows I'll dry oil
*CIA knows I'll dry oil

Heaven Falling

He was the one to hold me
The night
The sky fell down
And what was I thinking then
I don't know why
But he's changed my mind




*The Alternative*
(Dedication: I cry, I nod, so I'll walk)

(Acknowledgment: Evan & Jaron)

Panakip Butas

I need a chewing gum to fill in the holes of my boring pathetic life... Gum...Gum...Gum...

Maybe gummy Vers will do.

I Cry... I nod... So I'll Walk

"Y" is will lock in road...
"Why" is a question that gives you eternal flame of will to find answers on the never ending road... that is why it is the word locked on the road of life.

"I cry, I nod, so I'll walk" is the same as "Y is will lock in road"



"People can tell"
Our eyes cannot lie what our mouth denies.
Our actions cannot hide what we feel inside.

Everytime I hear love songs from the radio, its funny how it never reminds me of my first boyfriend (who is now my ex) nor my first heart broken... but it is you that suddenly pops up immediately in my mind when in fact you're just my friend... we've been friends like forever...

I love it when you sing to me... because you're not good at it and it makes me laugh out loud and all of a sudden I could just forget all the problems I have in my life.

You're not trying but you always manage to put a smile on my face.

I wonder if you feel the same way too...

So afraid that this is again just another one sided feelings.

And I wonder if ever I could wait just a little longer, could we be together then??? Cause we seem to be always paralleled to each other.
When I was single you are with her, when you two broke up I was with another... when we broke up, you have found someone else... but we are always there for each other, listening when even the the one we are with are so deaf to us... I'm glad to have you as a friend... but its making me weak... through the years, its like we lurked all are deepest affections towards each other somewhere. And now its haunting me... and if it haunts you too, what should we do now?

Sometimes I ask myself why are we so scared?
Then I just smile and say to myself, maybe because we treat each other so special that we are scared that we might hurt each other, then that would be unbearable.
We are scared because we indeed love each other?
Dream on? am I dreaming the sweetest dream in the bitter reality?

Till then I'll let God lead the way until our roads finally meet.

See you soon!!!

u just might get it

there was a time when i just stay late at night waiting for a shooting star to fall so i could wish upon it...

then suddenly one fine night, there it was, a shooting star fell...
it made my wish come true...
but it leave my sky empty...

that's when i realized, it was a lone star... the only star in my night sky...
how could i be so naive to ask for it to fall when it was the only light i have...
giving up forever for one wish...

a wish of a naive...

and could never put back that star on my night sky again.
... be careful what you wish for, cause you just might get it all... and then some you don't want.

BeAuTiFuL

Its as always...
A story of tragedy and hope...
Like "a walk to remember"; "If Only"; "City Of Angels" and the like...

Why does the girl always have to die and then life teaches the guy to go on and live his life all alone. Why does it have to be always a tragedy.

Is love not that great if both live?

Is love not that great if there was no death?

Is love not that great if not bitten by reality?

Is love not that great if there was no pain and sacrifice?

Love could be so beautiful until reality bites.
So there it goes...
Love is beautiful... maybe the only thing that is beautiful that heaven spared on earth.
Like every tragedy's lesson... common, simple but impeccably true: We can move on.

That in spite the bitterness of life can bring, never lose faith in love... because that faith in love that made you cry is the same thing that will help you move on. That love, no matter how many times life burn it and turn it up side down, love will remain the most beautiful... if not, the only thing that is beautiful in this world.

Love could create a monster... but a monster made of love is still beautiful.

If there's one word to describe love... - BEAUTIFUL.

And the only thing that remains beautiful... - LOVE.

Grinning Green

I don't believe that grass is always greener on the other side...
But I do believe that grass is green on both sides...
but we could always try and look on each sides.

Help me God to be bold enough to change even though nothing is for sure... even though the grass isn't greener on the other side... I know it still worth the try.

Help me God.

In Jesus name.Amen.

Vermonth

first day of the VER months...

mixed feeling of happiness and fear...
happy to be where i am now...
scared of what will happen...

Oh! God you alone I can trust. Amen.