Today is gonna be the day that they'll gonna throw it back to you... (wonderwall by: oasis)
maybe it was Thursday when they wrote that song.
Sometimes we need a break and have to smile!!!
Thursday, May 14, 2015
Monday, May 11, 2015
The Ballad of Sunsets and Shooting Stars
Ballad of Sunsets
"Your journey starts today" - that was the last words that I've heard from him - the man I've never seen.
Then I saw the light. I thought I had lived all my life in the light, until I realized that the light I once knew was actually darkness inside the womb.
The light I saw from a slit, an opening, as I watched a couple of hands in white gloves caught me. Then water suddenly came out from my eyes... my first cry.
I never knew what it was like to cry until my journey started.
My journey started on the day I was born. A journey I didn't ask but He said it was a gift...
until knowledge made it a curse, like an ignorance bliss that became an innocent tragedy.
When the sun sets, the day ends, and the night begins.
The same way my journey begun in the sunset of my ignorance... comes the night of innocence.
Ignorance is bliss.
Innocence is peace.
Until one day they were considered dumb.
For the wise knows no bliss nor peace.
And he knows it is not a gift.
My first taste of wine was as early as the dawn, the same way I have tasted bitterness of life itself.
When your childhood was taken away from you and you were force to grow up and start to think like adults.
The way you were suppose to be playing but you were force to plan for your life at a very young age.
The way I've got my lessons ahead compared with other kids.
It is not about being prepared for whatever life throws at you, but being strong enough to face them.
No matter what you do, life takes you by surprise in your most unprepared moment. And being strong is your only way to survive.
If you are strong... you are versatile.
Life forced me to be brave until I became too brave and forgot that fear could save a man from committing foolish mistakes.
Mistakes became often...
Regrets became jokes...
Pain became a laugh.
And so mistakes became teachers and they give a hell of difficult tests.
If you think life is the worst at the moment and nothing worse could happen anymore... the good thing is... it could be true.
If it is the worst then there could be on more worse.
Life is subtle.
The more we know, the more we ask.
My journey began at the sunset of my heaven the way the sun goes down.
So as I go down from heaven to earth on my birthday... He said - "your journey starts today. "
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Shooting Stars
Everyday is a choice.
Love is a decision.
Love is not all about feelings. It is a commitment that you give not just to someone but to yourself as well. Imagine love. Imagine it as something based on just mere feelings. Imagine you had a shit day and you're not feeling any love at all. Imagine ending up a relationship just because you're not in a good mood that day. Imagine love as shallow as you can see.
But love is never that way. Love is a decision everyday that no matter what happens, we still love.
It is a choice.
And so is forgiveness.
Everyday we have to choose whether to forgive or to revenge.
And everyday I battle with those choices within me.
But I choose to forgive everyday. I choose to see the white in spite of the blackness of everything around me.
And everyday is a madness, and everytime I found myself wanting to indulge in that moment of angst.
But I know it profits me nothing.
That is why I fight the urge to hate these people who caused me the worst pain I ever felt in my entire existence in this world
Just like a star who chose to fall, I had fallen so badly this time, and yes, I admit that I am scared that I might not be able to stand again, but it is also a choice whether to stand or remain crawling for the rest of your life.
And I choose to stand and move on everyday.
I am a warrior fighting not because I hate those in front of me, but because I love those people behind me... so I fight for them.
May God forgive me and so with these people I have come to hurt because of love.
It is my choice.
May God grant me the love that I have chosen.
And yes, He said "love your enemies"...
That is why we're not friends and neither I consider you my enemy...
For that one reason... I don't want to love you.
"Your journey starts today" - that was the last words that I've heard from him - the man I've never seen.
Then I saw the light. I thought I had lived all my life in the light, until I realized that the light I once knew was actually darkness inside the womb.
The light I saw from a slit, an opening, as I watched a couple of hands in white gloves caught me. Then water suddenly came out from my eyes... my first cry.
I never knew what it was like to cry until my journey started.
My journey started on the day I was born. A journey I didn't ask but He said it was a gift...
until knowledge made it a curse, like an ignorance bliss that became an innocent tragedy.
When the sun sets, the day ends, and the night begins.
The same way my journey begun in the sunset of my ignorance... comes the night of innocence.
Ignorance is bliss.
Innocence is peace.
Until one day they were considered dumb.
For the wise knows no bliss nor peace.
And he knows it is not a gift.
My first taste of wine was as early as the dawn, the same way I have tasted bitterness of life itself.
When your childhood was taken away from you and you were force to grow up and start to think like adults.
The way you were suppose to be playing but you were force to plan for your life at a very young age.
The way I've got my lessons ahead compared with other kids.
It is not about being prepared for whatever life throws at you, but being strong enough to face them.
No matter what you do, life takes you by surprise in your most unprepared moment. And being strong is your only way to survive.
If you are strong... you are versatile.
Life forced me to be brave until I became too brave and forgot that fear could save a man from committing foolish mistakes.
Mistakes became often...
Regrets became jokes...
Pain became a laugh.
And so mistakes became teachers and they give a hell of difficult tests.
If you think life is the worst at the moment and nothing worse could happen anymore... the good thing is... it could be true.
If it is the worst then there could be on more worse.
Life is subtle.
The more we know, the more we ask.
My journey began at the sunset of my heaven the way the sun goes down.
So as I go down from heaven to earth on my birthday... He said - "your journey starts today. "
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
Shooting Stars
Everyday is a choice.
Love is a decision.
Love is not all about feelings. It is a commitment that you give not just to someone but to yourself as well. Imagine love. Imagine it as something based on just mere feelings. Imagine you had a shit day and you're not feeling any love at all. Imagine ending up a relationship just because you're not in a good mood that day. Imagine love as shallow as you can see.
But love is never that way. Love is a decision everyday that no matter what happens, we still love.
It is a choice.
And so is forgiveness.
Everyday we have to choose whether to forgive or to revenge.
And everyday I battle with those choices within me.
But I choose to forgive everyday. I choose to see the white in spite of the blackness of everything around me.
And everyday is a madness, and everytime I found myself wanting to indulge in that moment of angst.
But I know it profits me nothing.
That is why I fight the urge to hate these people who caused me the worst pain I ever felt in my entire existence in this world
Just like a star who chose to fall, I had fallen so badly this time, and yes, I admit that I am scared that I might not be able to stand again, but it is also a choice whether to stand or remain crawling for the rest of your life.
And I choose to stand and move on everyday.
I am a warrior fighting not because I hate those in front of me, but because I love those people behind me... so I fight for them.
May God forgive me and so with these people I have come to hurt because of love.
It is my choice.
May God grant me the love that I have chosen.
And yes, He said "love your enemies"...
That is why we're not friends and neither I consider you my enemy...
For that one reason... I don't want to love you.
Thursday, April 30, 2015
bright lights, matches, and 20 bucks
I got a hole in me now.
I got a scar I can talk about... but I can't talk right now.
Cause some things in this world, man!... they don't make sense.
There are some things you can't leave until they leave you and all you have to do is miss them.
I got a scar I can talk about... but I can't talk right now.
Cause some things in this world, man!... they don't make sense.
There are some things you can't leave until they leave you and all you have to do is miss them.
Friday, April 24, 2015
Saving 10
They say I have high tolerance in pain... they say I am strong... I don't know, I'm not sure if that is true because I have my own reasons.
I remember when I was in pain, I was rushed to the emergency room and the doctor asked me in a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, tell me how painful it is?
I answered 5, that was to my calculation. Another doctor checked me again, asked me again, and still I answered 5.
Then they told me you should be fainting now, you should be saying 7 or even 10.
I just smiled.
I didn't say 10 because I know that life has a lot of more painful things to give me than that pain I was feeling then.
That was way back 10 years ago... "the fault in our stars" was not even written yet.
But John Green is right, I was saving my 10, even my 7, 8 and 9.
I was saving my 10 for other things to come.
And some people think I'm immature for my age just because I always wear the brightest smile... I don't give a damn. They don't know what kind of shit I'm going through in my life.
And to you who's reading this post... next time you see me joking around... think again... just because I'm always smiling doesn't mean I never cry.
I remember when I was in pain, I was rushed to the emergency room and the doctor asked me in a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the highest, tell me how painful it is?
I answered 5, that was to my calculation. Another doctor checked me again, asked me again, and still I answered 5.
Then they told me you should be fainting now, you should be saying 7 or even 10.
I just smiled.
I didn't say 10 because I know that life has a lot of more painful things to give me than that pain I was feeling then.
That was way back 10 years ago... "the fault in our stars" was not even written yet.
But John Green is right, I was saving my 10, even my 7, 8 and 9.
I was saving my 10 for other things to come.
And some people think I'm immature for my age just because I always wear the brightest smile... I don't give a damn. They don't know what kind of shit I'm going through in my life.
And to you who's reading this post... next time you see me joking around... think again... just because I'm always smiling doesn't mean I never cry.
Thursday, April 23, 2015
half and half but neither is whole
Promises... promises... promises.
The ugly truth about promises is that it tears you apart.
Because when someone made a promise to you, he puts you in between hope and despair. A part of you hopes for that promise, but the other half of you is just waiting for that promise to be broken... either way you are torn apart every moment.
So if jokes are half meant... then promises are half lies,
So then neither is whole,
So maybe promises are just jokes.
The ugly truth about promises is that it tears you apart.
Because when someone made a promise to you, he puts you in between hope and despair. A part of you hopes for that promise, but the other half of you is just waiting for that promise to be broken... either way you are torn apart every moment.
So if jokes are half meant... then promises are half lies,
So then neither is whole,
So maybe promises are just jokes.
Wednesday, April 22, 2015
amidst
For I am troubled on every side yet not in distressed, perplexed but not in despair.
Persecuted but not forsaken, cast down but never destroyed.
Persecuted but not forsaken, cast down but never destroyed.
Friday, April 17, 2015
7:30
When your legs don't work like they used to before and I can't sweep you off of your feet."
I was eating at McDonald's after my morning jog awhile ago, the morning sun is on rise and the perfect golden rays were seeping through the glass window making a prism on my table. As I was there eating my muffin, I saw one employee of the building sweeping the pavement. I watched him move sideways as he glides the mop and a thought came to my mind... that maybe love is like sweeping the pavement. Some might say "why do you have to keep on sweeping the pavement when it is impeccable and inevitable that eventually it will get dirty again." It's like - why do you have to brush your teeth when later on you will eat again...
I guess that is love... it is impeccable and inevitable that eventually we will get hurt but still we need to love again. It is not a foolish thing to do but it is a must, an important part of our living. If nobody cleans the pavement, then one day we would not be able to pass that way again. If we don't brush our teeth, then eventually we will suffer because they'll fall and then we can on longer chew and thus we can no longer eat the food we love.
Love is important part of our lives, and if we don't love , then eventually we will suffer as well. We will forget the meaning of happiness and compromise and kindness. And when all that is left is hatred, tell me, is it worth the living?
So I guess that is one nice lesson that could sweep off our feet.
Have a nice day!
I was eating at McDonald's after my morning jog awhile ago, the morning sun is on rise and the perfect golden rays were seeping through the glass window making a prism on my table. As I was there eating my muffin, I saw one employee of the building sweeping the pavement. I watched him move sideways as he glides the mop and a thought came to my mind... that maybe love is like sweeping the pavement. Some might say "why do you have to keep on sweeping the pavement when it is impeccable and inevitable that eventually it will get dirty again." It's like - why do you have to brush your teeth when later on you will eat again...
I guess that is love... it is impeccable and inevitable that eventually we will get hurt but still we need to love again. It is not a foolish thing to do but it is a must, an important part of our living. If nobody cleans the pavement, then one day we would not be able to pass that way again. If we don't brush our teeth, then eventually we will suffer because they'll fall and then we can on longer chew and thus we can no longer eat the food we love.
Love is important part of our lives, and if we don't love , then eventually we will suffer as well. We will forget the meaning of happiness and compromise and kindness. And when all that is left is hatred, tell me, is it worth the living?
So I guess that is one nice lesson that could sweep off our feet.
Have a nice day!
Thursday, April 16, 2015
pad me
It is an act of wisdom when you are full of pride but you know when to humble yourself. And when you humble yourself, it is the time that you really shine because you know that bending is not a weakness but actually a wise act that separates your body from your mind, your body bows down but your mind has a bigger plan.
Monday, April 13, 2015
share it
Sometimes when something so wonderful happened, you can't help but share it. This is rare that I got to post something not really mine... but this is worth sharing so...
This is from an anonymous person I just happen to bump with.
"In your lifetime, you will find and meet one person who will love you more than anybody you have ever known and will know. They will love you with every bit of their energy and soul. They will sacrifice, surrender, and will give so much that it scares you. Someday you will know who that is... sometimes or most of the time people realize WHO IT WAS. "
This is from an anonymous person I just happen to bump with.
"In your lifetime, you will find and meet one person who will love you more than anybody you have ever known and will know. They will love you with every bit of their energy and soul. They will sacrifice, surrender, and will give so much that it scares you. Someday you will know who that is... sometimes or most of the time people realize WHO IT WAS. "
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