Imagine a tragedy so ugly it should never have happened.
I grew up a Christian, but sometime, long ago, when I was still young, someone told me that my eagerness to serve the Lord could be my down fall as the Antichrist. So I guarded my heart and my mind to be a good Christian. I was so careful, so scared to fall that I might not get up again. But call it fate, call it a destiny or maybe a prophecy, but I'm like a Messiah who never had a choice. Like I was chosen and though it might seem like I have a choice, the path has been laid down for me even before I was born. It only looks like we have a free will but no, we never had a choice, I did not choose to be chosen.
So for my every wrong turn, I stood tall and ugly like Goliath, but with the sincerest heart of David who believes that he is doing the right thing.
So I stir them up into confusion.
For if you can't convince them, confuse them.
We always live in the grey...
The grey zone
There is a thin line between red and green, black and white, and so as to arrogance and confidence, humility and pride and that is the grey zone.
We don't need a god or the devil to do right or wrong. We, humans are capable enough to do what is right and wrong.
We do what we think is right, but oftentimes we do what is right for ourselves... Even though it is wrong in the eyes of others. We are always in a dilemma of two miserable things and it all comes down to which is lighter to bear. And to cope up with our guilt, we invent all the given alibis to justify our actions. We live in the grey zone where there is no perfectly right and perfectly wrong. We try our best to mix both the black and the white to escape our guilt and so everything becomes grey.
And for whatever reason that bad things happen to you, stop thinking that god is punishing you, stop blaming yourself. It is not you. It is never you. Things happen, that's just it.
Good things happen to bad people, bad things happen to good people.
We question the gods and we never get an answer, or the answers are not exactly the ones we had in mind. Questioning the gods could not help us one way or another... Because they don't answer.
For this is the truth, the truest answer of all: "Things happen for no reason at all, gods don't control it, we just have to make the best out of the bad things."
Blasphemy?...
You don't know how much is the price I paid for you...
And I did not asked for it.
Blasphemy... Oh blasphemy...
For one moment you will thank the gods for the blessings bestowed unto you, and another minute you are questioning the same god why did he allow those unreasonable tragedies to happen in this world.
And there are those wicked thoughts I never thought I will dare to imagine.
The born Messiah who never had a chance to choose.
Tragic.
Being born to be different.
But being different is not a sin.
We are all born beautiful,
But what makes you different makes you stand out.
And I'm making my stand... Outside.
