P.s. Every year on this day (Rizal day), I always post something about patriotism. Well, aside from the fact that it is the Philippines' National Hero's day, but also because I look up to Jose Rizal since I learned about him in our history class when I was in grade school.
But this post is somehow different from the previous years because this post is about a love untold. I'm posting it today because once in our lifetime, we encounter someone whom we took for granted and later realize that he was once became a hero... once upon a time in our own life.
This is a post about an untold love... for I believe that heroes are brave because they LOVE... Heroes sacrifice because of LOVE...
Heroes became heroes because of LOVE.
Ambiguous...
Blurry...
Half fiction...
Half fact...
For it is in the art of allusion that I could express all the suppressed feelings I have for you.
From the 3 am blogging up to Paul and John comparing.
From holding hands up to parting.
From Anakin up to Don McLean.
From Across the universe up to Imagine.
It was never my intention to hurt you nor to ignore your feelings towards me. I was just a coward girl. Too coward to love you because I believed in what others told me that in loving a person, it is inevitable even in the midst of innocence, to hurt them.
And because loving can hurt...
I thought I can save you from that pain by suppressing my feelings towards you.
I didn't love you back because I was scared I might hurt you, I was scared to hurt you because I don't want to lose you, I don't want to lose you because... I LOVE YOU.
So forgive me if I loved you that much that I'd rather deny this feelings...
But believe me... I suffered more than you'll ever know for not letting you know that I loved you too.
Forgive me for turning my back to you twice...
And all I can do now is ask "what if ".
Love you secretly for we can never be... now.
I know you're Happy...
I hope you're Happy...
Til then... you will always be... My music...
My playlist...
My John Lennon...
My Dawson...
My Jedi...
My lullaby...
My old school...
My rock and roll...
My Beatles...
My Strepsils...
My a Walk to Remember...
My own Back to December...
My hardest fight...
The allusion of the songs I write.