throwback Thursday

Ode to Dawson's creek
Anderson... my perfect what if. Once, when we were together we thought about the future, now you're gone I only thought about the past. The way I threw away the number you wrote on a piece of paper because I thought at that time I was not worth it, maybe I was too scared, or maybe I was too young, or maybe it was a mistake meant to be done, maybe its a destiny meant to be my "what if" forever. It is when all the lies suddenly sunk into the sea and the truth just came out and its ugly. Those things happen in teens and still happens after. And after Dawson and Pacey is gone all that is left is that "what if" with Anderson.
There was a time in my life when I was so in love with Dawson but I was so insecure, I was so afraid. I thought I was never good enough to have a Dawson, I thought I don't deserve such kind of guy, so I found myself falling with Pacey, but it did not work out the way movies and fairy tales do. But now I'm no longer scared, and right now if Dawson knocks again on my door I would be courageous enough to let him in. No more doubts, just faith that I deserve to be happy.

When everything falls apart, I hope they all fall in the right places... and if everything crashes, land with me.

shades of your gray

When you trudge your way from black to white... everything in between is gray.
Its gray... but less darker than black.

My Sunday Blog

A frown face doesn't mean you are serious, it means you are grumpy headed.

Being so serious doesn't mean you are mature, it means you can't stand life gracefully.

Maturity is about facing your problems in a graceful way, it means even though you are in pain you still smile, it means even though you are at your darkest moment you can still manage to laugh.

So never judge a person who always wear the brightest smile, it is just a POSITIVE ATTITUDE

Jesus and electric chair

If jesus died in an electric chair, would people wear a miniature electric chair around their neck, have electric chairs hang on the walls of their homes, will they worship electric chairs?

Cause that is what it has become of the cross.

You are like dark chocolates in my mind...

Cause you are my bitter-sweet memories.

beautiful imperfection

Beautiful Imperfection

I don't appreciate perfect things because perfect can no longer improve. I always find imperfection beautiful, like a dark night that makes the stars glow brighter, like an old ugly shirt that fits you like a second skin. Imperfection is beauty that is so pure. Pure appreciation.

I guess our mistakes make us imperfect, and imperfections make us beautiful. As what the saying " The virtue of angels is that they cannot deteriorate, but their flaw is that they cannot improve.
Man's flaw is that he can deteriorate, but his virtue is that he can improve".

Mistakes, I guess, is meant to be made. And I will keep on making the same mistakes cause those mistakes will lead me to YOU.

cold hell

I believe that hell has the most vehement flames because its too cold down there with no one to care, where love never exists... so cold that fire is the only friend with warmth beneath

Autumn Leaves

Autumn leaves are meant to fall
Whether it is forced by nature
Or it is destined by the future
Green, red and brown means all.



Maybe Cupid had once fallen apart
For sharp are the arrows of a broken heart
Or is he too clever to know the art
Or his heart unhealed so he cursed the lover's mark


For the heart of the angels feel all the pain
But what time heals for humans, to angels remain
And who is more lonely than the thing that never dies
Reach heaven or raise hell, in love I would cry.

3am Has Secrets

Its 3am and I can't believe that I'm singing this old song in my mind... again... when I thought I wouldn't be able to sing it again...

It goes...

Like an ocean needs the sand or a dirty old shoe that fits.
And if all the world is perfect I would only ever wanna see your Scar.
You know they can have their universe we'll be in the dirt designing stars...

I'm like a faith without a clause to believe in it.
And if all the world is smiling I would only ever wanna see your frown.
You know they can sail away in sunsets,
We'll be right here stranded on the ground... just happy to be found.

I am throwing myself at things I don't understand... discover enlightenment holding your hand...


So beautiful...

Just like what I've said before... 3am has the deepest secrets... and the greatest ideas too. I don't know why ideas could simply seeped in my mind at 3am. Anyway, have you ever wonder how people fall in love in mysterious ways... well I do, and I think people are like those wires and those cellphone chargers... no matter how neatly and tidy and organized you store them inside your drawer, when you get them again they are all coiled up with each other like noodles and it will take you time to loose them all. Just like people, when they get to know each other, became closer, soon you'll find their hands holding each other. And it will take time to get those strings unattached. Love is natural