Ember of Chances

She's doing good in her life so far,
She's not looking for another permanent scar.
Then you're coming right off bat,
Leaving footprints all over the path.
Like a mountain lion
Resurging from zion.
So dangerous yet so beautiful.
Strange on her like a fool.
She would touch you if she could,
Even though she never should.

She's too strong to feel pain now,
But then somehow,
You left her with another permanent scar,
And the deepest so far.
You've got that elemental gravity,
You get all things fall within your vicinity.
Just as they thought they're flying over to the atmosphere,
You got them spinning all around and your hand is on the sphere.

Is it her looks or is it her wits?
Made you tell the truth right from the gist.
Without a jest or a twist,
Beautiful lies all caught up in a mist.
She built that bridge of chance.
And you burned it while she watched the ember turn into ashes...
Then suddenly a trance.

Creed

Because of the recent drama in my life, I found myself totally jaded, exhausted and seriously wasted, so I decided to go and see a movie today.
I've been planning to see the movie "Bohemian Rhapsody" since last month but my schedule was totally in a brink of collapsing for too many activities. I was really hoping its still showing. Unfortunately, Bohemian Rhapsody is no longer on the run and I was really disappointed, but then, since I'm already at the cinema, then might as well watch any movie that's available on the screen. I was thinking of Robinhood or Fantastic Beast 2 but I'm not in the mood for bows and arrows and Harry Potter this time. No offense, I am a fan of Harry Potter.
So I decided to watch Creed 2 thinking it was the sequel of the movie Assassin's Creed.
Well, stupid me, its not Assassin's Creed 2, but another movie series of Rocky Balboa.
Damn! Though I'm a fan of Rocky Balboa movies, I'm not in the mood for a boxing movie today. But then again, too late. I already had my ticket.
So while I'm inside the cinema, I realized that I've been playing solitaire for almost... I can't remember but I'm comfortable being alone. Not to mention I'm the only girl watching this movie. Then during the fighting scenes of Draco and Creed, I was not aware that I'm punching and clapping my hands all along... I was being carried away by the fighting scenes. Imagine a girl, alone, watching a boxing movie. Damn! solitude is mocking me.

But the beautiful part of this day's disappointment is that, the movie is not that bad. In fact, it is a good movie. Like God did make me watch this to realize something that is connected to my recent drama. And that is, old people are always wiser than the youth. Period.

Creed's story is different from the usual underdog boxing movies because in here, he is the champ.
A champion who's about to lose his belt to an underdog.
Its a story about living within other people's expectations, about the pressure of having to win all the time, and the self doubts and abandonment. But it's also about family sticking with you till the end, win or lose, fight or run.
And at the end of the day, we don't fight for someone, we fight because it is our battle. And we stand up not for someone but because it is our ground and we have to stand up for it.

At the end of the day, we fight invisible battles because it is our fight. We don't fight because our loved ones want us to fight, but because it is our own battle and we have to fight to survive because we want to live to see them... Again.

And sometimes we do run away from a fight... No, we are not damn cowards... We run because we are not ready to fight, and if we're not ready we might lose, or worse, die. And we want to live just one more day to see our loved ones again.

But the irony of it all is that we can't run forever. Sooner than we thought we have to face our giants. So while we're running, we must also prepare for that day when we can no longer run, and no way to turn but to face the battle.


It was not what I planned to see, but I'm glad I did watch this movie.

Toasted Bread

If there's one thing that I've learned from the recent drama in my life is that... No matter how strong or wise we thought we were, older people will always be wiser and their personalities will always be stronger than the youth. And there's always something to learn from them.
And no matter what, no matter how sure you are that you're right, at the end of the day, older people will always be right and the youth wrong. Damn it all you want but they are damn always right. Because they are wiser beyond our years. And we have to accept that fact.
Well, I finally accepted that fact that I still have to eat a lot of bread to be like them. Its still a long long way full of bread.
Thank you for imparting another lesson.
You are a great boss.

Books and Authors

They say "Don't judge the book by its cover".

But I say - Don't judge the book when the author is not yet finish.

So don't judge me because I'm not yet done in my life... And the great Author is not yet through with me.

The Art of Doing Something Again and Again

This song is on repeat mode in my playlist for the nth time... And also in my mind.
Can't get over these days.

Boston
(by: Augustana)

In the light of the sun, is there anyone? Oh, it has begun...
Oh dear, you look so lost, your eyes are red and tears are shed,
This world you must've crossed...
You said...

You don't know me, and you don't even care, oh yeah,
And you said
You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah,

Essential yet appealed, you carry all your thoughts across an open field,
When flowers gaze at you... they're not the only ones who cry when they see you
You said...

You don't know me, and you don't even care, oh yeah,
Well you said
You don't know me, and you don't wear my chains... oh yeah,

She said I think I'll go to Boston...
I think I'll start a new life,
I think I'll start it over, where no one knows my name,

I'll get out of California,
I'm tired of the weather,
I think I'll get a lover and fly him out to Spain...

Oh yeah and I think I'll go to Boston,
I think that I was tired
I think I need a new town to leave this all behind...

I think I need a sunrise,
I'm tired of the sunset,
I hear it's nice in the summer, some snow would be nice... oh yeah,

You don't know me, and you don't even care, oh yeah...

Boston... where no one knows my name...
Where no one knows my name...
Where no one knows my name... yeah

Boston...
No one knows my name.

The Art of Doing Something Again

I have nothing against book series, in fact, I've read a lot of it.
But the reason why I have to stop myself sometimes is because other books are piling up and since I'm hooked with a series, I'm not able to read those.

Like I remember when I read those Mortal Instruments series, I got hooked and I've read 19 of Cassandra Clare's books for only a couple of months... But she's not stopping writing and other books are piling up on my desk. So I stopped, though her books are really really good.

That also happened with Lauren Kates's Fallen series.
Ilona Andrews' Kate Daniels Magic series.
Kiera Cass' The Selections.
Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles, Songs of the Seraphim and The Wolf Gifts.
Just to name a few.

So in the mean time, before I return for another series, I'm reading AGAIN the book of Jose Rizal - Noli Me Tangere (Social Cancer) for the fifth time. I remember reading it once in grade school because I was a fan of Rizal since I started reading. Another one in highschool and again in college because it is a part of our curriculum. Then again when I was in my mid 20's. And now, for reasons... I'm a fan.

I believe it is a good habit to re-read and keep on re-reading those books you've read because there is always something new to learn. It's like looking at your window everyday, it's always the same view but there is always something new to notice. You missed it once, you'll miss it again, so better look at it over and over again.

Mid 30's Health Crisis

Our lifestyle these days determine our life span in a probability of 99.9% based on my own theory, of course. 😁
It is true that we will eventually reap what we sow.

I used to say (and I still do until now) that it is not the length of years but the depth of a life lived that matters. So why not eat just about anything and everything to enjoy life, at least when its time to reap what you sow, you already enjoyed your youth. Damn wrong right?! 😁
And now, I just reaped what I sow. I was diagnose today with diabetes. Though I was half expecting it for the longest time since my mom has it and so is my brother. But still, no one is prepared to hear bad news right?!
So I guess sweetness has a price to pay... And its bitter.🤔😭

🎶🎵🎧 Music Addiction

I've been addicted to his songs since I can't remember...
But this one remains my favorite.

Still Fallin
Hunter Hayes
You'd think for all the days I’ve known you
That I would have you memorized by now
With Every question answered,
Every single page turned
But you keep me on the edge somehow
And every day with you is still a mystery
With the sweetest story's falling from your lips
I hold on to every word,
Like it’s the first one that I’ve heard
It’s the only time I’ve ever felt like this this
But after all this time, you’d think I’d be used to the pull of your gravity
And after flying so high for so long, who would think
I’m still learning, still burning, still fallin', still fallin'
I still reach for your hand because I need it
And your kiss is still the spark that lights a fire
You’re still laughing with me,
And we’re still making memories,
I’m still a fool for you, and there’s a million reasons why
After every late night street light drive
Every love you miss you kiss goodnight
Girl, your name is still my favorite
Always will be and I’m still wanting, still all in, I'm still fallin'
I'm still fallin',
Still chasin', still nervous, still reelin', still dreamin' about this
And after every sunrise holding you,
After all the crazy we’ve been through
Every day and every minute girl it’s something new,
I’m still learning, still burning, yeah still wanting, still all-in, still fallin'.
Still falling.

Hollowed Bee thy Thorny Crown

Oh! Unqueenly bee who art in throne
Hollowed bee thy thorny crown
As hollow as thy brain
Is thy empire of shame.

Hail! My lady you're full of blaze
Such a mother of disgrace
Thou art rubbish among women
Thou are not worthy to speak the word Amen.

Glory be to the chains of wisdom
Ye never had in thy kingdom
For as it was in the beginning
Thou wilt fall by the ending.